Pump the brakes on your week and take 10 minutes to make your life as a surgeon just a little better…
Jeff welcomes ENT surgeon and professional coach Dr. Mel Thacker to the podcast.
Each of us carries two inner selves — the essential self and the social self. When these two are in harmony, we’re capable of extraordinary things. But when they’re out of alignment, it can lead to dissatisfaction, stress, or burnout.
The essential self is our true nature — who we are at our core, from birth. The social self is the identity we build over time to meet the expectations of others. As infants, we cry when we’re upset — pure essential self. As adults, we may feel like crying but force a smile to keep others comfortable — the social self at work.
So how do we bring these two selves into balance? Dr. Thacker offers three key steps:
- Step 1 – Recognize that most of us are living unconsciously. We tell ourselves we’ll be happy after we attain the next milestone. This is the arrival fallacy. Instead, we need to live consciously.
- Step 2 – Explore your earliest memories and consider why they stand out. These moments can offer valuable insights into your essential self — the version of you that existed before external expectations took over.
- Step 3 – Consider working with a coach to explore, identify, and integrate your essential and social selves. A coach can help you uncover unconscious patterns and align your path with who you truly are..
Most importantly, PRACTICE being your essential self!
Mel Thacker, MD, PCC, DipABLM
Mel Thacker, MD, PCC, DipABLM is a fellowship-trained rhinologist/otolaryngologist, professional certified coach, and lifestyle medicine specialist.
After two years in academics, she realized how much she valued autonomy and pivoted to private practice, serving a Massachusetts community for nearly a decade. But when panic attacks and insomnia took hold, she turned to coaching—transforming the most emotionally painful year of her life into her greatest teacher. She emerged on the other side as a better human, clinician, surgeon, wife, mother, and friend. After that experience, her work evolved from taking care of patients to resourcing her fellow surgeons.
- Watch her TEDx talk, “How to Save Lives with Two Minutes of Listening,” here.
- Her second TEDx talk, “Seeing Beyond the Red Swans,” will be available in Spring 2025.
She is also the host of the groundbreaking podcast, Surgeons with Purpose, and the Founder of Empowered Surgeons Group, a program that will teach you everything you didn’t learn in surgical training.